Nope, no extra crazy here today thank you!

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So, today has been an official pyjama day in the house of myself & Chops. I have done no housework, no proper stuff, not even got dressed- either of us! We have just chilled out in our pyjamas and do you know what, it was exactly what we needed. We haven’t had any days where we just do nothing together without anyone or anything else interrupting us in ages and sometimes it good to just be together without any extras. And then along comes an ex boyfriend and pisses all over my chips. Here’s the story. When I was 21, I spent half of my 2nd year at uni living in Wagga … Continue reading →

Why?

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Why do I blog? Easy. Not simple, but easy. I’ve always loved to write. I love the power of the written word, how you can become completely transported, fall in love with an idea, an imagined character or place. Last year, I met my boyfriends neighbour C*. You probably know of her if you blog or tweet, she’s a bit of a dab hand/expert with all her social media type stuff. C blogs & has done for years and out of curiosity I googled her to see what that meant exactly. I kind of knew what blogging was but had never really read any- it hadn’t interested me. From C’s … Continue reading →

Love After Love. A National Poetry Day Meme

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As it’s National Poetry Day, I’m sharing my all time favourite poem with you all. Love After Love The time will come when, with elation you will greet yourself arriving at your own door, in your own mirror and each will smile at the other’s welcome, and say, sit here. Eat. You will love again the stranger who was your self. Give wine. Give bread. Give back your heart to itself, to the stranger who has loved you all your life, whom you ignored for another, who knows you by heart. Take down the love letters from the bookshelf, the photographs, the desperate notes, peel your own image from the … Continue reading →

Ghosts

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A conversation on Twitter with Alison Daly (@alidaly40) got me thinking last night about ghosts & the supernatural. I’ve actually been thinking about ghosts a little this week already as it happens. Chops has suddenly reached the stage where, out of nowhere she has become afraid of the dark. She is also frightened of owls, monsters & ghosts. I don’t know where this has come from, it started about 3 weeks ago and no matter how I racked my brain I couldn’t think of what had set her off. All of a sudden, out of nowhere she would come running to me, inside the house in the middle of the … Continue reading →

Blaming The Jones’

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I have already written yesterday about Finding April Jones. But having only been up with my daughter for an hour some of the tweets and opinions I’ve seen flying around have made me so worked up I felt I had to say more. To those of you out there who are shouting your mouths off about “Where were her parents?”, “Why was she playing out alone at that time of night?”. Yes. I know these are valid points. I know my daughter wouldn’t be out alone at that time. But are you honestly telling me, that you have NEVER lost sight of your child, not even for one second? Last … Continue reading →

Find April Jones

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I’m sure you’ve all seen the news. April Jones aged 5 went missing last night, October 1st 2012. She was near her home in Machynlleth (link to map here), playing with friends but was seen getting into a grey or light coloured van at around 7pm. These photos are of April in the clothes she is believed to have been wearing when she was taken:        Police are appealing for any information, A hotline number has been released for people to call with information – 0300 2000 333. Please look carefully at these pictures and keep your eyes wide open today. This little girl is just 5 years old … Continue reading →

Help

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Tomorrow I have my first session with the counsellor my GP referred me to a few months ago. I’m very, very nervous. I was diagnosed with depression last October and started on medication. I didn’t accept my GP’s suggestion of counselling for a while after that, I’m still not sure how I feel about it now. It took a long time before the doctor and I managed to get my meds right, but whenever I had a check up the course of the conversation usually just goes along the lines of whether I feel better or worse than the last time she saw me. How are my eating and sleeping … Continue reading →

Bedtime

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I need a milk. Mummy where’s Ruffus gone? Can I have another cuddle? I bumped my finger can you kiss it better please? Where’s my blanket? It’s not bedtime, yet! I’m not lying down. Mummy can I have a snack? Where’s the music gone? Why is it dark outside? NIGHT NIGHT MUMMY!! (sits up grinning) Can I have some of your drink? What you doing Mummy? Can I have another story? Can I have my socks on? Mummy… ? (expectant pause) I need a snack! Can I phone Gan-dad? Where’s  my nummy(dummy) gone? I don’t like this teddy bear. Is it breakfast time? NIGHT NIGHT MUMMY! Yeah. You’ve been there … Continue reading →

Houdini

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In the period of time between my last relationship & G coming into my life, I ventured out into the terrifying world of dating. Not just dating either. Online dating. Having worked out ok for me once (that’s how I’d met my ex), I had faith in the experiment which it turned out was not quite as sceptical as it could/should have been. I went into the whole thing too quickly to be honest, my heart and ego were still badly bruised from how it had all ended with D and I was in a “I’ll show him!” frame of mind. Believing, tragically and naively that finding someone who wanted me, in whatever respect, would make … Continue reading →