My first doctors appointment, checking in appointment, and everything else with the exception of the birth and the scans, I was alone. I remember weeping, hidden in the toilets of Mothercare, alone, surrounded by couples and families, exuberant grandparents grabbing and exclaiming at blankets, tiny pairs of socks. I felt her move inside me and pushed a trolley around alone, gathering moses basket, blankets, sheets, steriliser, baby monitor and all the other essentials. I’d gotten the grant I’d been forced to use to buy them the previous day as I’d been made redundant in my 13th week and was struggling financially by this stage. It couldn’t wait, I knew the money … Continue reading →